“Take away what you’re known for and whatever’s left is who you are.” – Bob Goff

What’s happenin’?

I did a post on this on instagram, but the topic deserved an actual post. SO here we are.

2020 has been weird. It’s been different, for sure. We are over halfway done with it, and I know I personally can say that it hasn’t looked like how I thought it would.

I’m not saying that this is necessarily a bad thing. I’m just happy to be feeling great, not sick, and not have any loved ones or close friends truly affected by covid. What a great life that is.

On top of covid, our country has had to take a step back and see right before our eyes that something isn’t right. There are a lot of people hurting, and struggling, and having a really hard time.

Personally, I’ve been reminded (again) that nothing we have or aspire to be in life is certain. Life happens. Things change.

At the start of 2020, I was looking forward to be able to compete in 4 individual CrossFit sanctionals, and with the opportunity for maybe even qualifying for more! I was finally feeling GOOD – not recovering from surgery or any weird little injuries. I used to rap and say “THIS GONNA BE MY YEAR.” I mean, let’s be real… I had no intention of qualifying for the CrossFit games, as I just don’t have the time to commit to that (or the muscles, or skills, or work capacity lol ). But I did have a good showing in the Open last October. I got 63rd in the world, and 31st in the USA, and 1st in South Carolina). I only know this because I just looked it up. BUT placing a little higher than I thought I would gave me some confidence to know that I could at least hold my own at sanctionals this year.

I am so grateful for the two big competitions I got to compete in this year pre covid – Mayhem Classic and Wodapalooza. I was always ok with the other ones getting canceled, as well as the other qualifiers because I knew that there were a lot more important events happening around me, and people were facing problems way greater than an event being canceled. It is still sad to think that Wodapalooza could be the last sanctional or big individual competition I’ll ever compete in, when I didn’t know it at the time going into it.

In the midst of all of this, Daniel and I have taken steps to adopt! We have tried for several years to get pregnant, and we both knew that FOR US, hormones and other fertility methods weren’t what we wanted to go through, but instead, we thought how amazing it would be to hopefully be able to pursue adoption. That has been really cool, and we are literally two spots away from becoming an active family with our agency.

But all that to say that this year has been GREAT, but it just hasn’t gone like how I thought it would. Oh, you too?

This year has really made me question WHO I am, what I’m known for, what my values are, and how I can contribute to this world. I’ve always pondered this and tried to make a name for myself outside of fitness. However, I’ve thought more about it this year.

I heard this quote from Bob Goff the other day (I think it’s from his Everybody Always book): “Take away what you’re known for and whatever’s left is who you are.”

For me, I personally feel like I have been known as the fit girl, the CrossFit girl, the athlete, the coach, the girl with the abs, the girl with the big arms(lol), the girl with the back abs, the girl with the big butt (just kidding about that last one).

And all those things are GREAT. I’m so thankful for that. Believe me. But I know that those things won’t last forever. And if 2020 has shown us anything, it’s that nothing lasts forever. I am 32 years old (I think). I’m still so young, with a big future ahead, but I am also not like in my 20’s anymore. Ha. I can feel it.

If I wrap my identity up in all of the above things I mentioned, then when and if they are gone, or taken from me, then who will I be?

I’m not trying to get too deep or anything, but just pondering over this.

There is more to you and me than what we are known for. If any of what we are known for it is based on our looks and/or abilities, that is awesome. HOWEVER, we need to remember that there is more to us. There’s more to you, and there is more to me.

I’ve been trying to watch what I say to people – especially younger girls. Yes, I want to compliment someone when I see how strong they are, or how fast or fit they are, or how great they look in my eyes. And as a coach, you better believe I dish out all the positivity (skills, nice hair, cool new shoes, anything!) But I’ve been trying my hardest to call out what else I see in them (outside of appearance or abilities) – like “Hey, you are a great friend.” Or “I look up to you as a mom.” Or “That was really kind what you did for that person.”

IDK if I’m even making sense, but in my own little world I am.

SO, if you’re still reading, and interested, then hopefully…

  1. We can keep being the best versions of ourselves. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be good at something, training for something, taking steps to LOOK GOOD. I worked out this morning and I tried my best. I also weighed and measured my lunch out to make sure I am eating the right foods and the right amount. And I feel great about all of that. However, we have to know that with that, nothing is certain and nothing is forever. Our identity shouldn’t be wrapped up in that. There is more to us, so we have to figure that out.
  2. We need to start calling out the good we see in others that isn’t based on looks or skills. I’m not saying that we can’t call out someone for having a 6 pack, or for being a badass at CrossFit, BUT we need to start acknowledging people for who they are outside of looks and skill.

Ok, that’s it for today. Have a great weeeeekkkk!